I have a confession: I am a yeller. I hate this about myself. I get frustrated and then I get loud. I desperately want to change. No, I have to change. For my girls, for their girls. I’ve also noticed that Fern has started yelling at Amelia a lot lately. I tell her, “Gentle voices please.” Then I feel ridiculous because I know that I’m basically saying, “Do as I say, not as I do.” I recently read a post by The Orange Rhino. It made a huge impact on me. I also sort of felt relieved that I wasn’t alone, that I didn’t have to deal with it alone. I realized that there were people like me that had changed or were in the process of changing. The Orange Rhino also has a wonderful facebook page where you can get help and support from other orange rhinos. I wanted to share this here because I need to be accountable. My goal is to not yell for a whole week. It’s sad that that sounds like a long time to me. If I make it a week my new goal will be a month. I hate yelling. I hate hearing it no matter who the victim is. I hate doing it. Not only is in ineffective, it makes me feel guilty about the emotional damage I am doing to my children. I have left situations where I lost my patience and yelled thinking to myself, “What the heck is the matter with me? Why would I react that way to my small children?” Of course, my inner monologue uses stronger language. I have a million reasons I give myself for why I yell: I didn’t sleep well, I need to eat something, they are not following directions, I am frustrated about something completely unrelated to my children not following directions. The list goes on. I am certain, though, that NONE of these reasons are good enough to use as an excuse. Nothing can excuse my yelling. My children are precious, delicate gifts and I must treat them as such. So here I am, about to become an orange rhino.